Mr Tall Dark and Incredibly Wrong

He's tall, he's dark, he's handsome. He's funny. He's smart. He's part Italian and part Persian, has a gorgeous accent, and  comes from Dubai, the city of glitter.

Did I mention he lives here?

Wouldn't you know that before I'm even fully engulfed in my physical goal, another goal shows up. I haven't even put it in writing yet -- a factor all the experts say you must do. Yes, I want a relationship, too.

For our first date a few weeks back he asked that I wear a little black dress with cleavage and leg, Chanel eau verte, and fuck me boots (ecusez-moi pour ma français). 

The fm boots also had to be black. 

I had pearls, though he would of preferred Tiffany's. He had other requests as well -- but let's not get distracted in details.